One advantage is the fresh perspective they bring on the growth and development of my children.

My wife and I often worry that my son isn’t eating enough and grow concerned that is STILL weighs only 50 pounds (for what seems like 18 months now). Watching him play hockey three times a week, we often lose sight of how much better he gotten since last March. Similarly, my daughter’s progress at the drums is much more noticeable to those who see her monthly than to those of us who attend every lesson and hear her practice daily.

As much as I wish we could be together more often, I appreciate the attention our infrequent visitors bring upon the progress and accomplishments of my children. They are great kids and are deserving of recognition and praise. While I would like to give them their due, I sometimes lose sight of just how hard they work and how well they do.

So, this Christmas, I got the extra gift of a fresh perspective… and it was one of the best gifts I got.

This being pre-NCLB-centered education, what went on in the various classrooms was not as coordinated as it is today. Some teachers regularly covered more material than others, and the work load and expectations were certainly not standard within the school. Ms. Miller pushed her students harder than nearly any other teacher in the school and her popularity suffered as a result. As I remember, she didn’t really care – she was very confident she was doing the right thing.

For many of the honors students in her class, this was the first time we were challenged. Our “excellence” had allowed us to coast through classes with high floors for a long time, but here we were challenged. Sentences had to have context clues showing you knew the meaning of the work. Books used for book reports had to be above grade level. Spelling and handwriting had to be reflective of the bright students we were.

I hated it, and I rebelled in the most passive way possible. Nearly every day, about 10 minutes before English class, I would go to the nurse and complain of feeling “fluish”. This went on for several months. Sometimes I’d just rest in the nurses office, sometimes I’d go home. But I wasn’t going to English class.

Go me. Good job earning my first D! I really showed Ms. Miller, huh?

In hindsight, someone should have intervened. I should have been challenged by the nurse or a guidance counselor. Ms. Miller did have an “I know what you’re doing here” conversation with me once, but being enemy #1, I just dismissed what she said. But I never forgot it.

Nor, did I forget the things she taught me.

My son has never had a “Ms. Miller.” Some of his previous teachers have shown flashes of Ms. Miller’s values, but the heterogeneous grouping of students in his classes, overly generous classification of “honors students”, emphasis on high-stakes test scores, standards based reports cards, and grade-level wide uniform lesson planning have inhibited their efforts to emphasize spelling and hold high expectations.

So it has fallen to me to impart the lessons I learned (despite my best efforts to ignore them) from Ms. Miller. I stress the importance of good spelling in assignments where spelling mistakes will not be penalized. I encourage the construction of vocabulary sentences which allow the reader to discern the meaning of the word from context clues. I recommend reading accelerated reading choices which have been around since the 70s over the latest Judy Moody book. And I encourage my son to always do his best, even when a lazy effort will be considered among the top showings.

Like Ms. Miller’s lessons, these messages are not always popular with my son. And, like Ms. Miller I’m content with that. I do wish that he was hearing it in school and I could be in the role of reinforcing the ideas instead of seeming to add to the workload, but I’m confident it’s the right thing.

I never thanked Ms. Miller for what she did. I never apologized either… I was too young and immature to realize how wrong I was and how right she was. But she WAS right, and I’m happy to be in a position where I can help my son excel by sharing the things she taught me.

My teenage daughter was another story all together. Maybe I’m getting old, or maybe it’s because I am the Mom of a teenage girl, but it seems that all of the female costumes are way too provocative. We walked into three different Halloween stores over the weekend to shop for costumes and it was the same story in all three: Costumes were divided in essentially three sections: Kids, men and women. Although my daughter is only 14, she is 5’ 10” and wears a size 5. She’s tall, beautiful, athletic, and smart (I’m her Mom and legally required to brag!). But I bring this up because she has not fit into the “kids” Halloween costumes since the 5th grade.

What was rather disturbing was the selection of the Halloween costumes available for my daughter. All of them – Yes, ALL of them were down right sleazy. I’m pretty sure prostitutes dress more conservatively than what’s available in the women’s section at the Halloween store. Here are a few names of the costumes for sale: Sexy Witch, Sexy Bat Girl, Fantasy Baseball Gal, and my all-time favorite: Sexy Zombie. Really? Who finds zombies sexy? By the way that costume consisted of hot pants and a torn up, very tight, very low cut dress, all for $59.99. I’m pretty sure I have an old dress she can cut up for zero cents, and she can skip the hot pants.

Most of the costumes had the same layout: Extremely short skirts (or in some cases you bypass the skirt and go for the super tight, super short shorts), extremely low cut tops, 6 “ heels, and fishnet stockings. Put a little makeup and do up your hair and you have what they call a Halloween costume. Most parents would never let their daughter wear anything that short, or that low cut on any regular day. So why is it suddenly acceptable to allow our kids to dress like this on Halloween? It’s not. Go over to the men’s section and there is not one single costume titled, “Sexy…”. Why? Are men not sexy? Or maybe it’s just acceptable that only women be allowed to dress like whores on Halloween. Thankfully my daughter was blessed with intelligence as well as looks and simply stated, “Mom, I’m not dressing like a slut for Halloween”. In the end, she decided on being a mobster girl, but thankfully, not the sexy one.

I do remember when Glee first came on the air. I had no interest in watching it. I’m not sure exactly what it is about the show that turned me off. I love acapella music. I like underdog stories. I’ve known and liked members of choral and glee groups.

Perhaps it’s because I watch very little live TV. Maybe it’s because I’ve invested in many shows only to see them get cancelled early on in the first season. Possibly it’s because as much as I like underdog stories, I’m not a fan of martyrdom, especially overly dramatic “poor, unappreciated me” people. I do know quite a few singers and choral directors who seem to fall into that category. I dunno, I just wasn’t interested.

As my daughter has grown older, my wife and I have been looking for television shows we can share with her. At Paul Goebel‘s recommendation, I introduced her to The Middle (which she liked), and on my own last month I introduced her to Glee on Netflix.

The first episode was a little heavy, compared to my daughter’s usual Disney Channel/Nickelodeon fare, but my wife loved it and my daughter was interested and patient enough to give it a few more episodes. It’s now become one of their favorite shows, as they are averaging four episodes a week as they race to get to Season 2.

I admit, I’ve enjoyed it as well. It’s less acapella than I’d expected (and hoped), but it’s good. It gets a little whiny sometimes, but so far it’s pulled itself back just enough.

My concern, so far, is not the maturity of the themes (so far it’s been fine), it’s the constant references to the Glee kids as “losers.” They call themselves “losers”. Other people call them “losers”. It’s clear they are meant to be misfits, but it’s declared over and over again.

Now, my wife and I do talk about what we see on TV with our kids. So, we made a point of addressing this with our daughter. “The point of the show,” I said, “is that they’re really NOT losers, at all.” My daughter agreed, and we went on to discuss it in much more depth: What would you do? Has anyone ever treated you that way? What could this character have done? etc., .

It almost had me pull the plug. If my wife hadn’t immediately taken to the show and there had been a viable alternative, we might’ve given up on it quickly, but so far it remains in our Netflix Instant Queue.

I do find myself still looking for that perfect family show to share. The Nick and Disney shows are decently produced, but they have such snarky young characters and such dumb adults – not what I’m looking for. Yes, there are game shows and singing competitions we can watch. She’s still a little young for the Mythbusters/Top Shot/Chopped type shows we watch with our son, and I find myself still looking for a good family show to share with my wife and daughter.

For now, I’ll give in to Glee, but I wish I felt better about it.

• All 7 families allowed their children to eat “bars” (a category we defined to include “milk and cereal bars”, “granola bars”, and “health/diet/protein bars”).
• Only 2 of the families gave their children health/diet/protein bars. The reasons both families gave was that these bars were “healthier”.
• 5 of the 7 families said they regularly bought only 1 flavor, and all 5 of those included chocolate in some form.
• All 7 families said they would allow their child to have one bar a day if the children so desired.
• 6 of the 7 families said they would NOT allow their child to have one chocolate bar a day if the children so desired.
• 2 of the 7 families said that they considered a peanut bar such as Payday to be a healthy alternative.

There is surprisingly little advertising for “bars” on television. The popularity of the bars seems to come from word of mouth or print advertisements directed at adults, touting the nutritional aspects.

The fact remains, however, that the bars are far less healthy than most adults believe.

What were your experiences with and feelings with bars as snacks and meal substitutes?  Please share your thoughts below.

Don’t get me wrong:  they absolutely love going to the lake – they love going out on the boat, hiking the trails, and hanging out with family.  The hurdle they will have to overcome is that they will have to live without their precious media outlets.  My daughter will have to live without texting and my son without video games.  They quickly adapt (takes approximately one day), but just like an addict they go through ‘technology withdrawals’.

An article in the New York Times indicated that teenagers send and receive an average of 2,272 texts per month – almost 80 messages a day!  Combine this with Facebook and/or Twitter posts, internet searches, Television, and video games, our kids are saturated in media daily basis.  It is part of their lifestyle and their daily routine, and it is no wonder that when they are told to unplug (typically due to being grounded and losing their phone privileges) a protest is likely.

What I find really interesting is their lack of ability to truly articulate their feelings when they do lose their texting privileges. Even with the constant communication they do, they are unable to formulate a compelling argument on why they should be allowed to continue texting! I believe that it’s because they don’t have as much practice in verbal communication as I did at their age.  After all, texting typically occurs in short 180 character messages. They rarely call a friend on the phone and instead rely on the written (texting) for their comment/question.  Their messages are shorter and perhaps even more thought through. Having an actual conversation involves verbalizing your feelings immediately rather than taking a few minutes longer on how to respond to a text received – There is no backspace or edit capabilities in a verbal conversation. It makes me wonder what impact this type of messaging will have on our kids when they enter into the working world?

I think this trip is exactly what the doctor ordered.  Each year we are brought closer and have great memories of the annual lake trip.  And sure enough when we come down from the mountain the phones will come out and the texting will begin again – until next year’s trip when we do it all over again.

• 4 of the 13 families are done with their back to school shopping
• 6 of the 13 famlies have begun shopping but are not finished yet
• 3 of the 13 famlies have not begun shopping for school supplies at all
• 5 of the 13 have not yet received a formal “supply list”, and 4 of those 5 have begun shopping already.
• 10 of the 13 famlies expect to spend more money on school supplies than last year, even though 8 of the 13 plan to buy less items and/or reusue items purchased in past years.

What are your family’s shopping habits?  Do your children reuse most supplies? Do you shop at a single store? Do you use a school issued supply list?

Please share your thoughts below.

You see, my wife had bought juicy, deli franks. The ones with the sausage like casings. And as the dogs heated up on the grill, they made a little squeaking/hissing sound.

My daughter was in tears, “they’re screaming, Daddy!” she sobbed. And how could i make them stop? Poke a hole in it? Lift them off the flame?

The kids know hot dogs are meat and technically not “dogs” but they don’t understand the whole processed food. And to see them “plump when you cook ‘em” and to make a noise as the pressure burst the casing was just too much.

They obviously didn’t eat any hot dogs (I wonder if they ever will again), but did come back out and join us.

I attempted to explain what they had witnessed by heating a “steam in the bag” vegetable pack in the microwave, but I’m not sure it took.

We’ll see. But one thing’s for sure. We won’t be having hot dogs this weekend.

My kids laughed and became excited for the new Chipmunks movie, but I had to wonder – did the studio really expect fans of the Chipmunks to be familiar with Titanic?

It turns out that my 9 year-old daughter HAS seen Titanic (she saw it a few days later), but she’s one of the few preteens I know who have seen the movie. Her older brother has not (heck, it’s a long film).

Obviously the “I’m the Kind of the World” scene is iconic, but I wonder what other pop culture scenes and references should kids be expected to know? As a fan of Family Guy and Robot Chicken I see many of the things I grew up with regularly referenced, but those shows are aimed more at my generation. What are kids expected to know?

In trying to think of some “must know” characters, catchphrases, and bits of dialogue I found that most my first thoughts are probably past their period of relevance:

• Dr. McCoy’s “Dammit Jim, I’m a doctor not a ________”
• The Terminator’s “I’ll be back”
• The classic Shatner-speech-pattern parodies
• The haunting music from Jaws
• Bond’s “Shaken, not stirred”

I haven’t seen Cars 2, but I understand it has a Bond-type character. How Bond-y is it? Does Pixar expect most kids under 10 to know the Bond-isms, or are they there for the adults (in which case, I don’t consider it to be what I’m talking about)?

The Fairly OddParents cartoon regularly drew upon other pop-culture characters: Dark Laser is clearly a Darth Vader reference, the April Fool is very Seinfeld-ian, Catman is played by Adam West in a clear reference to the original Batman TV show, and many more. Are those for the kids or the adults?

I’ve started giving my son some classic literature to read: Gulliver’s Travels, The Time Machine, Treasure Island, 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, Journey to the Center of the Earth. He loves it and it will help him better pick up on the many references in current movies, books, and TV.

He’s been exposed to Godzilla, Star Wars, and Star Trek. I will try to bring in the first 2 Terminator films later this year.  We watch old game shows on GSN and lots of old TV through Netflix, Antenna TV, and TVLand. Overall though, I’m not sure where else to turn.  He’ll get some Edgar Allen Poe in school (I hope).

How important is it that he see Ferris Beuller and Better Off Dead? They’re great films, and he’s going to see them before he sees Titanic.  Maybe in Chip-Wrecked they’ll have a scene where Simon stands and stares at a painting whlie a Smiths song (covered by the Chipmunks, of course) plays in the background.

The main reason for that is just kids don’t have anything to compare it to, so they like things they can relate to, and what they can relate to is simple. So as an adult, you are going to have to listen to some crap, get ready for it, dread it if you want, but you will have to accept it.

Like all things though, you have an opportunity for neat little experiences as you help a young person grow intellectually. As an example, let me tell you about my nephew and his fondness for New Kids on the Block. Something I found out about on the way home from miniature golf.

My nephew and I were talking about music. I was telling him what I like, why I liked it, and he was telling me what he liked. Now, I could have been dismissive, lord knows it’s easy. But in general when I talk to kids I like to come at it from a point of respect. That’s not to say I don’t make fun, I do, because I do that with people I respect. But I also always try with kids to explain exactly why I think what I do, so they can judge if I’m being fair, because maybe I’m not.
Here’s what I said to my nephew.

You know, it’s cool that you think this kind of music is good. However, when you learn more about music, you’re going to realize this music was mass produced by people who just wanted to make some money. I lot of really good music you have to work harder to hear, because it isn’t always accessible on the radio. So yes, definitely enjoy your music, but don’t be afraid to listen to other kinds of music, you’ll be very happy you tried it.

My nephew is a working musician now, no fooling. Quite talented and he makes my taste in music appear pretty pedestrian. The only reason I remember this story at all is because he told it to me. He told me the story of my conversation, and how it made him think about music that day, and how he decided he was done with New Kids (Sorry New Kids, that wasn’t my goal, I promise). Today my nephew is a musician. Now, I’m not really responsible for that, he’s the one that did the hard work, going to college and being in a ton of bands. But I did have a gentle hand in being encouraging and honest at the same time. Never pass on that opportunity to share an idea with a kid, you’ll be amazed what they do with it.

Hear more from Jim on The Paul Goebel Show podcast and at his Conspiracy Nut blog, http://theconspiracynut.blogspot.com/. You can also follow Jim on Twitter @ComicJimBruce.